Horticulture tips

The only thing on my mind this morning is where shall I plant the maple tree. The one clinging to life in a plastic pot by our back door. All my research indicates the tree needs morning sun, afternoon shade. No wind, good drainage, nice neighbors, no loud parties.
I've fretted over the fate of our little tree, the foolishness of our original purchase, our ability to be good companions.
I've finally come up with the solution. Today I'm digging a hole in the middle of our living room floor, no wind, good drainage, nice company, morning shade. We're hoping for a long life.